FROM THE BOOK OF QUESTIONS #20

Another question from Gregory Stock’s book is this:

If you had the choice of one intimate soulmate and no other close friends, or of no such soulmate and many friends and acquaintances, which would you choose?

This is interesting, because currently I have neither!  But in the past, I’ve tended to have one close friend at a time–I’ve never had many friends and acquaintances.  My last close friend was Jay, whom I met in high school.  But the onslaught of my mental illness, at age nineteen, and some highly offensive remarks I made while intoxicated, drove him away (I used to binge-drink back then, a way of self-medicating–something people with mental illness often do before they find any effective medication).  Last I heard, he lives in another part of Florida now, is divorced, and has one son.  And I’ve tried contacting him, through his mother (who’s a newspaper columnist in Mobile), but haven’t received any replies from her.  I miss Jay quite a bit–just as I miss the good times we had together.  But as stated in the film, The Natural, “Some mistakes we never stop paying for.”

On to the question, though, I’d rather have one intimate soulmate and no other close friends, if I had to choose.  And this soulmate would definitely be a woman.

Earlier this evening, while leaving the drive-through at Hardees, I braked for a young couple walking.  Though each wore a small knapsack, I don’t think they were homeless.  But I envied the young man, homeless or not.  It was clear that these young people were in love.  And I thought how I would actually give up my house and everything else, for what that young man had–a soulmate to walk through life with him.  The Beatles sing, “All you need is love…”  And though I don’t know if it’s really that simple–I do know that love helps, to say the least.

2 Responses to “FROM THE BOOK OF QUESTIONS #20”


  1. 1 Abby April 7, 2012 at 10:34 am

    This one is interesting, because my knee-jerk answer is to go with the “many friends”. Maybe that’s out of going for the opposite of what I have. I’ve been married for nearly 22 years, and I have friends and acquaintances, but I haven’t had truly close friends since we moved here 8 years ago. I miss my good friend from the last place we lived.

    If I wasn’t in a long-term committed relationship, though, I bet I would choose the soulmate answer. It’s easy to take for granted the things we already have. I hope you and Jay reconnect some day!


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