And here are two more timeless items from Paul Harvey’s For What It’s Worth:

Our For What It’s Worth Department has learned that at William and Mary College in Virginia there is a faculty member–Dr. Mitchell Byrd–and Dr. Byrd teaches a course about birds.

Sometimes he goes up in a light plane or helicopter–to count eagles and ospreys in their nests.

That explains yesterday.

The telephone caller to William and Mary asked to speak to an ornithologist. 

The caller was told, “That would be Dr. Byrd.”

“You have an ornithologist named Byrd?”

“Yes.  But he’s not here right now; he’s out flying.”

“You have an ornithologist named Byrd and he’s out flying?”

“That’s right.  Would you care to leave a message?”

“I don’t think so.”

February 3, 1987


Our For What It’s Worth Department hears that Ann Connolly was in the Red Food Store in  Knoxville, Tennessee–shopping for groceries.

While she was momentarily distracted somebody snatched her purse from her shopping cart.

Now, Miss Connolly is a real estate broker . . .

Carries one of those talk-back beeper devices for telephone paging . . .

Carries it in her purse.

She hurried to the manager’s office telephone and dialed herself.  Then spoke into the phone knowing her voice would be transmitted through the beeper in her missing purse.

Because she always carried the beeper in her purse she had the beeper turned up good and loud.

Produce manager says you should have seen that surprised man standing there with her purse . . .

And the purse was talking . . .

And the voice was saying . . .

“Take this purse to the manager’s office immediately.”

And he did!

June 7, 1985

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